How to overcome fear

In my opinion fear gets way too much attention, fear lets people take no action or even fear is hold them back from taking further action.

And I also think that it’s something that’s very in common and if you think about it…

…you’ll agree that the majority of our fears are not because of physical reality or danger either.

Most of our fears are simply thoughts and pictures that we’re re-running too often.

Because of that we believe that the feeling to fear is such an unknowable scary awful thing. The thing is that mostly it’s not.

Most of our fear is really just a disorder of our thoughts.

The majority of people believe that fear is something impulsive, something that all of a sudden overcomes your body.

The reality is, it’s not.

Once you get a deeper understanding what fear actually is, then you’ll be able to overcome it much faster than you might think right now.

Let’s break it down…

What is this fear that we think will bring so much pain and sorrows into our lives?

Have you ever asked yourself that type of question?

“What is this fear that I’m feeling right now?”

Once I understood the first time what this fear in my life actually was, why I experienced it so often, it didn’t scare me at all.

When something becomes knowable it’s actually easy to develop competence. And once you can develop competence around something, you’ll also be able to build confidence around it too.

The more you understand things, the more confidence you can develop around it.

After studying fear, what causes it, how to deal with it and how to overcome it for many many years, I’ve figured that there are actually just 3 type of pains hat causes us to feel fear.

Once you understand them, you’ll get why you experience fear so much in your life.

You will no longer be frustrated or letting it stop you from achieving your goals.

The first pain is the pain of loss.

When we do something new, we might experience loss. That thought let’s us experience and feel fear.

Let me give you an example…

When I built my first business, I also felt that kind of fear of loss… fearing to lose the relationship and connection to my spouse, my kids and losing the security of a regular 9-5 job.

In addition to that, I also had a ton of people telling things like that it’s not the right time, you don’t have enough experience, why do you give up your security, your income security, your social security…

…the list goes on and on…

Long story short, if I’d listened to these type of nay sayers, I would probably never have started to build my own business.

Or another example is when I started to quit smoking.

I’ve smoked 2 marlboro packs every single day, on weekends sometimes 3.

I remember all these concerns, all the bad stories you can read and hear from people who tried stop smoking and all of a sudden they start gaining belly fat, they lose their peace of mind, they start becoming more and more nervous…

…again, the list is very long.

For me personally, I didn’t want to lose on having a good looking body, I didn’t want to gain belly fat.

I also didn’t want to lose my peace of mind.

That’s why I always sabotaged myself every time I tried to quit. That self sabotage caused me to give up every single time.

Instead of focusing on all the things we don’t want, all the things we lose, all the things we have to sacrifice, wouldn’t it be more wisely to focus on all the things you gain in exchange?

Yeah… I might lose that peace of mind, or yeah I might gain some belly fat for the first few weeks, but the long run my body becomes more healthy and I also start to discipline my mind, I strengthen my will too.

When we fear something, our mind always start to ask:

“What if…” and then usually it follows a negative phrase or a negative statement.

“What if this awful thing happens in my life?”

The more we keep asking ourselves this kind of question when we experience that feeling of fear, the more we sell ourselves in the idea that maybe the outcome probably wouldn’t be that good.

We convince ourselves not to take action. We let that fear paralyze us.

So instead of focusing on the loss, focus on what you gain.

The 2nd pain that we fear so much is the fear of doing new things.

I vividly remember when I built that first business, I was so scared because I didn’t knew a lot of things.

I didn’t knew how to build a simple website, how to generate leads not even to mention that I had no clue how to sell to them either.

Making a change in our lives is what causes us to fear. It’s doing something new.

Before I finally quit smoking, I never considered a positive thing I would experience and gain in exchange.

The biggest fear I had was that withdrawal symptom you get when you stop an addiction to something.

Many people avoid at all cost obstacles and challenges, but instead of avoiding them we must embrace them because they are the number one shortcut to get everything we want in our lives.

See, in order for you to get all the things you desire so much, you must become the person who deserves all these things.

If you are not worth it as a person to get these things, life doesn’t give them to you.

Let me share a very powerful strategy I learnt a few years ago and it always helped me overcome my fear very very fast.

I want you determine a goal you want to achieve.

Then I want you to pain a picture in your mind where you see yourself as if you’ve already achieved it.

But, I want you to see yourself with a big smiling in your face achieving that goal.

Remember that picture as often as possible during the day, especially when you feel fear or you’re scared to achieve your goal.

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Thank you
Christian

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